#howtobefriendstress - How to Be friends with stress

How to Befriend Stress? – Is It Possible?

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Before we start discussing stress in this article, you need to know one important fact that stress is basically a lifelong friend that we cannot get rid of. Stress is always there, anytime, anywhere, only sometimes we can feel it, sometimes we can ignore it. To live healthier both physically and mentally, we need to make friends with our stress. Not only so we can control it, but also handle it well. But how can we befriend stress? Is that even possible? Let’s have a look at the review below.

How to Befriend Stress? – Is It Possible?

How to befriend stress? #befriend stress

Many people think that stress is the ‘enemy’ and the cause of unhappiness. Therefore, avoiding it is often used as an alternative way to overcome it. In fact, this method can actually make your stress level higher, you know. And the fact is, many people and experts say that actually stress can actually spur us to live our life for the better.

Also read: Understanding the Difference between Stress and Anxiety

Is it possible to befriend stress?

The answer is: YES. We can definitely befriend stress.

When experiencing stress, a stress hormone known as cortisol is released. Cortisol is good if it happens in a short time because it increases our focus range in doing something. However, if the level is already high, it can even have a bad influence on your brain cells and the body’s immune system which results in diseases or disorders.

But, do you know that there is a hormone called oxytocin that has an anti-stress effect by reducing blood pressure and cortisol level? The oxytocin hormone is known for its healing and growth. This hormone can also stimulate various types of social interaction. So that means, positive social interactions through touch and psychological supports can trigger the release of the oxytocin hormone that promotes health.

Why do we want to befriend stress?

How to befriend stress? - Be friends with stress promote personal growth

According to Stephen Joseph, professor of psychology at the University of Nottingham, people who can manage stress and use it in constructive ways will experience extraordinary personal growth. This positive stress can provide encouragement to complete tasks before deadlines, do more reps in the gym, and also alertness.

Joseph explained, there are five situations that create stress in a moderate amount that can have a positive effect on your life.

1. Stress at work

Stress at work - Be friends with stress


Want to live a stress-free life? Then check your ambitions. According to the Director of The Stress Institute, Kathleen Hall, people who do not have a sense of stress, in general, are people who are not ambitious. “Being stressed at work means you are productive. You work under deadlines and are motivated to reach higher positions and seize opportunities. The key is, you need to focus on achieving your goals,” he advised.

2. Stress at home


Stress at home - Be friends with stress



When stressed, the body secretes the hormone cortisol to speed up metabolism, according to a study from Stanford University. A long stress response can trigger health problems, but if it occurs occasionally it will improve the ability to remember, strengthen the immune system, and activate brain cells.

3. Stress in competition

Stress in competition - Be friends with stress


Competitions often cause stress. According to Hall, if you are never stressed, then you will never know your greatest potential. “Stress in the competition will make you bring out your best potential to win it,” she said.

4. Stress at school

Stress at school - Be friends with stress


According to a study in Social Indicators Research, stress at school will provide benefits, one of which adds to the intelligence of your brain. Students who are stressed academically are more likely to excel in class.

5. Stress in the gym

Stress at the gym - Be friends with stress


A study in the Journal of Strength and Conditioning Research reveals, positive stress is associated with certain biological functions that help the body become stronger to do exercises in weights. When the body feels it reaches its limits, the body’s stress will stimulate adrenalin which helps with discomfort.

Also read: Deep Breathing Exercise for Stress Management

How do we make stress our friend?

Is there a way to be friendly with stress? Grishma Giri, a doctor from Nepal, explained the 8 ways to make friends with stress as follows:

1. Unplug ourselves

unplug yourself - be friends with stress


Everything in this life strives to keep us connected and hold ourselves back. If you are stressed, what to do is release yourself from your daily routine and enjoy life.

Get out of the house, leave the cellphone and all other gadgets so you don’t need to check emails. Give a chance for you to rest and see how this can work wonders in your life. Disconnecting ourselves from all daily activities will provide an opportunity to recharge ourselves.

2. Share what troubles you

Share - be friends with stress


Stress can make you feel helpless and weak. If you already feel exhausted, you need to talk about that feeling with friends, parents, bosses, or anyone who is comfortable talking to.

Sharing a problem will reduce the burden of that problem. Talking with your closest friends will help motivate and generate ideas that can be used next.

3. Have enough sleep

have enough sleep - be friends with stress


To maintain physical and mental health, you need to sleep well. You should take a rest at least for 8 hours a day so you can take time to reflect and relax. Having adequate rest will get rid of disturbing negative thoughts.

4. Keep moving

keep moving - be friends with stress


Sit or lay down all day or do nothing will only worsen your problem. You must get up and move to reduce the stress you feel and make yourself calm. Find something you enjoy doing that can make you busy. You can exercise, write journals, clean up the house, etc.

5. Stay focused

stay focused - be friends with stress


Stress will drain energy and destroy the enthusiasm for work. You need to stay focused when dealing with various problems and use your time wisely in order to solve them. If stress causes problems, think about your life in a different way. Create ways to deal with it, make a to-do-list and push yourself to get things done so you’ll feel better and happier later.

6. Realize that there are things that cannot be changed

acceptance - be friends with stress


Sometimes the best way is to accept the fact that the past really cannot be changed. Accept the fact that all things happen there must be a reason. There are things that really can’t be changed.

We have to stop wasting time and energy thinking about mistakes in the past. Consider those mistakes as lesson learned that will help you to do better next time and avoid those same mistakes again. What has passed will not come back, so start living in peace with yourself, accept what you have now and look for better opportunities to improve the quality of your life.

7. Generate a positive attitude

Positive attitude - believe in yourself - be friends with stress

Always thinking about mistakes will create negative energy that will undermine confidence. If you are stressed because of mistakes that have been made, you don’t need to feel frustrated.

Seek help if you can’t fix it yourself. Build a positive attitude and try to release the burden of negative emotions. Learn new things and do something that makes us happy.

8. Create a new perspective


create a new perspective - see things in the bright side - be friends with stress

Stress can actually help you look at life in a different way. For example: You just broke up and are now lonely. Go to parties, meet friends and find people who can be invited to enjoy how beautiful life is.

Learn from your mistakes, correct yourself. Success will not run away from you if you change and start seeing things in a different way.

Also read: What is the difference between stress and depression? – Know the symptoms

Other ways to make friends with stress

Be friends with stress

The authors of ‘Peak Performance’, Brad Stulberg and Steve Magness share 4 steps you can follow to make friends with stress.

1. Choose the conditions that you want to master so that your stress can focus on solving the problem there

Know in advance and be specific about what you want to overcome. Without planning, it will be difficult for you to focus on the goals that you want to realize. Once you know clearly, then you also divert your stress into focus on the next steps you must take. That’s what successful people from various professions do. They know what they are afraid of and try to conquer it.

2. Seeing stress from the positive side

Getting out of your comfort zone and facing challenges that have never been felt is not easy and can trigger stress. Maybe a variety of negative thoughts about your goals arise, but face your anxiety. Because actually it only happens in your mind. By looking at it from the positive side, basically the stress that arises can stimulate you to improve your performance.

3. Take a break

Taking a break is different from ‘avoiding’ which means giving up on your target or goal. Giving a break to rest, means you only do it for a little while. For example move on to hobbies or do short projects. If you are an athlete, you can switch to lighter training. That way, you are physically and mentally fresher once you are back to pursue your long-term goals.

4. Return to your daily routine

Once you feel more refreshed, return to your routine. Try to push yourself to make greater achievements. For example, for athletes by doing new types of exercises. This way your ability level will increase.

Also read: What is stress management? – Definition, Causes, Levels, Strategies, Tips

Understand stress and make it your friend

In addition to taking those steps, to help you better understand stress and how to make it your friend, you can check out the TED video from Psychologist Kelly McGonigal.

There you go, folks. Hope this article is helpful. Now you know that it is possible to befriend stress. Can you do that? Let me know and leave a comment below.

Please also share this post with your friends! 🙂

Stay safe, happy, and healthy!


This post may contain affiliate links, which means I make a small commission off purchases, at no extra cost to you. Read my full disclosure here. Thank you for supporting the work I put on this site!



We Stress Free does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. However, if you need someone to talk to and want to make friends, please feel free to reach me at ferra@westressfree.com. If you would like to REDUCE your STRESS and are interested to do an ONLINE THERAPY, you can do so here.

Online Therapy to reduce stress


Disclaimer: The information contained in this article is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as health or medical advice. Always consult a physician or other qualified health provider regarding any questions you may have about a medical condition or health objectives.


Thank you for reading today’s topic: How to Befriend Stress? – Is It Possible?

18 thoughts on “How to Befriend Stress? – Is It Possible?

    1. Ronald,

      Thank you for your kind words and comment. I really appreciate it!
      It helps me to keep creating a better experience for my readers when they visit my site and read the posts.

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  1. Hi Ferra,

    Thank you for sharing this article. I never really thought of befriending stress before, but after reading your article, I can see the merits of working with stress instead of fighting it.

    Like your article states, some stress is beneficial and in some cases life-saving. Mismanagement of stress can be bad for you. Been there, done that!

    I think the key is knowing yourself to be able to identify the stress that is causing you negative feelings. Only then can you take appropriate action.

    I think this pandemic is teaching us all how to face stress in ways we never dreamed possible. Learning this lesson will make those of us who want to learn much stronger.

    I hope you keep adding to your website with the fee-good stuff that really works. I wish you all the best on your business endeavor.

    1. Hi Bob,

      I agree with you. Knowing ourselves and what’s bothering us will definitely help in finding the solutions to our problems.
      This quarantine due to COVID-19 pandemic is surely something new that helps us to adapt and learn. Nobody saw this coming but this too shall pass.

      Thank you for your kind comment and insights. I really appreciate it!

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  2. wow.. this is an amazing article, I now and I allowed that we live with stress at any time.. but what I learned here open a big door to understand and direct my stress on the good way, thanks for your article, again it is amazing..

    1. Hi Marlon,

      Thank you for visiting my site, reading the article, and leaving a kind comment.

      Glad you found this article helpful. Hope it is helpful to others as well.

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  3. Excellent read. A lot of great insights given too.

    Taking a step back, identify stressors and how to improve and then reinforcing the positives.

    Great set up keep it up!

    1. Hello there,

      Thank you for visiting my site, reading the article, and leaving a kind comment.

      Glad you found this article helpful. Hope it is helpful to others as well.

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  4. So… I say the title to this article and I had to read it😀

    Looking at how we all look at stress, in a positive light or even as a friend, can do all of us a ton of good.

    Thank you for pointing this out. I think I might link to your post in one of my post in the very near future.

    Thank you for changing my outlook on my little friend, stress

    1. Hi Greg,

      You’re welcome. Glad you found this article helpful and interesting to read. 🙂

      Cool, I also think about linking my next post with one of your blog posts.

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  5. Such a timely post to come across!
    Now that most of the world is under the lockdown we all have to deal with some kind of stress- especially the financial type!
    Myself I’ve been experiencing a lot of stress with my partner lately – he’s always home now and I have to deal with him 24/7, plus my toddler on the side! Not easy,
    it’s like having 2 kids at home lol
    Thanks for this helpful post, I’ll definetely use some of your tips on how to befriend the stress.
    Take care and stay safe:)

    1. Hi Agnes,

      Thank you for visiting my site, reading the article, and leaving a kind comment.

      Glad you found this article helpful. Hope it is helpful to others as well.

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  6. Hi Ferra
    I read your post on WA about pintrest and realised we are in the same niche 🙂 I agree with everything you say about stress. Stress, when it is working well and for you is called eustress. There is one important thing that people leave out and that is the underlying cause of too much stress, which is always the fact that we are not meeting our needs.

    1. Deb,

      Yay, we’re having the same niche. 🙂 Thank you for reminding me about eustress. I’ll write about in the future.

      Stay safe, happy and healthy!


  7. These are some excellent tips! Little did I know, I have recently started following a lot of these things.

    I thought back to a time when I was in high school and I was doing so many extracurricular activities and I was super stressed, but I would always write in my journal before bed.

    Not only was I able to sleep better, but I found that I didn’t have that tense feeling of holding things inside.

    I recently started a journal again and I’ve started taking CBD gummies to help me sleep and I’ve always been physically active.

    Since adding all of these things to my routine, I’ve been sleeping MUCH better and have had a lot more energy at work.

    I do need to work on changing how I view stress though. It’s not an enemy, it just means I’m very ambitious, which is a great thing! It’s really amazing what our bodies can handle and how it adapts to so much.

    1. Hi Aria,

      That’s amazing. The combination of writing in a journal, CBD gummies, and a good night’s sleep definitely helps to improve our overall health, especially our mental health. Kudos!!

      Thank you for stopping by my website, reading the post, and leaving a kind comment.

      I appreciate you for sharing your thoughts and support.

      Glad to hear that you found this post useful.

      Stay safe, happy, and healthy!


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